Our Own
by suchaphangirl
Summary: MPREG PHANFIC. Dan and Phil have been trying to adopt a baby. They get another rejection. Dan is about to give up all hope until he finds out he's pregnant.


Dan Howell took a deep breath as he stared at the envelope that he was holding in his hands, the envelope that held the adoption letter for him and his boyfriend. This felt like the millionth time that they had gotten an adoption letter. They had been trying to adopt for nearly a year now.

Dan was slowly giving up hope on being able adopt. He would have given up by now if it weren't for Phil.

Phil was so sure that they would be able to adopt, even though they had been trying for a whole year, he was just so full of hope and positivity. Dan didn't know how he did it.

Dan was turning 28-years-old this year, in a couple of months. Phil was turning 35-years-old. Dan wanted to adopt a baby now before it was too late, before they were too old to adopt a baby.

That's why Dan was so nervous about opening the envelope. He was supposed to wait for Phil but Phil was out at the moment and he couldn't wait any longer. He needed to open it now.

"Please," Dan begged as he closed his eyes. He took another deep breath and then he finally opened the envelope. He bit his lip harshly as he opened the letter. He scanned through the letter.

They had been declined again, and Dan knew exactly why.

"Fuck!" Dan screamed at the letter. He ripped the letter in two as tears poured out of his eyes. He fell over onto the couch and held onto one of the pillows as more tears poured out of his eyes. Dan couldn't take anymore. He was giving up. He didn't need any more of this.

"Dan?" Phil called as he walked into the apartment. He walked up the stairs and frowned when he didn't get a reply. "That can't be good." He whispered. He quickly made his way to the lounge. He looked up and frowned when he saw his boyfriend lying on the couch with tears pouring out of his eyes. He looked down at the floor and sighed when he saw the ripped up letter. "Another rejection?" Phil asked as he walked into the lounge, and then he walked over to the couch.

"I can't take anymore, Phil," Dan whispered. He whipped away the tears on his cheeks.

Phil frowned. He sat down in front of Dan. He whipped away the tear that had slipped out of his eye. "I know we've been trying for adoption for a long time now but…" He began to say.

"A year…" Dan snapped, cutting Phil off. "It's been a year Phil."

"Has it really been that long?" Phil asked with shock.

Dan slowly nodded. "I don't know if I'll be able to handle another rejection," he said. He slowly pushed himself up. He looked over at Phil. "We should just give up."

"We can't give up, Dan. I won't allow us to give up," Phil said. He took a deep breath.

Dan stared at him as more tears poured out of his eyes. Dan hated crying in front of Phil but he couldn't hold it in anymore. He just needed to let everything out.

"Dan, please don't cry." Phil whispered. He gently wrapped his arms around Dan and pulled him into a hug. Dan hid his face in Phil's chest as Phil held onto him.

Dan and Phil must have sat there for hours. Phil held onto Dan while he let Dan cry. Seeing Dan cry absolutely broke Phil's heart. He wished there was something that he could do but he knew that he couldn't. He knew what Dan wanted and Phil couldn't give it to him.

"I'm really sorry Dan," Phil said as he followed Dan into their bedroom. It was around midnight when they were finally going to bed. Dan was exhausted and he just wanted to sleep.

"Why are you apologizing?" Dan asked as he crawled onto the bed.

"You're upset and there's nothing I can do to make you feel better," Phil said. He sighed.

Dan frowned and looked over at Phil. "You are making me feel better… by being there for me. You let me cry on your shoulder every time we get another rejection. I don't know who else would put up me with me but you do." He said. He took a deep breath.

Phil couldn't help but smile. "Well… then I'm glad I can help you in some way," he said.

"Just… promise to never leave me? Even when things do get hard for us," Dan begged.

"I will never…" Phil began to say as he crawled onto their bed. "Ever leave you."

"Good. Because I don't know where I'd be right now if it weren't for you," Dan whispered.

Dan and Phil stared at each other a few seconds, without saying anything, before Phil gently pushed Dan on his back and captured Dan's lips with his own. They kissed each other a few seconds before Dan finally pulled away. He took deep breaths as he stared Phil.

Phil bit his lip as he stared at Dan. "I love you," he whispered before he kissed him again.

It's been about a month now. Dan had begun feeling sick and he didn't know why. He always got sick in the mornings with horrible stomach aches and sometimes he got massive headaches. He would always snap at Phil for the littlest things. Dan nor Phil knew what was going on with Dan.

"Dan, we need to go now or we'll be late!" Phil shouted.

"I'm coming! God," Dan grumbled as he walked out of his room.

Phil rolled his eyes. By now, he was used to Dan's little snaps. It upset him but he never told Dan because he knew that it would start an argument and that's the last thing Dan and Phil needed.

"Can we go?" Dan asked as he walked down the stairs.

"Dan, I've been ready to go. I've been waiting on you," Phil said.

Dan scoffed and then he opened the door and walked out of the apartment.

"Dan," Phil groaned. He shook his head and then he followed Dan.

About a half an hour later; Dan and Phil finally made it to the hospital. Dan and Phil were both waiting in the hospital. Neither has spoken a word since they got there.

"I'm sorry Phil," Dan whispered as he looked over at Phil.

"Don't worry about it," Phil mumbled as he looked down at his hands.

"But I am worried about it. We have never argued this much since we've been together. I don't know what's going on with me and I'm sorry. You shouldn't have to put up with this," Dan said.

Phil finally looked over at Dan. "Put up with what? Dan, I love you. I made a promise to you. I promised that I'd never leave you even when things get hard for us," he said.

"You remember that?" Dan asked. He couldn't help but smile.

"Of course I remember that," Phil said. He reached over and grabbed Dan's hand.

Dan looked down at their hands and smiled.

"Daniel Howell?" Dan looked up as soon as he heard a women call his name.

"That's me," Dan said as he stood up from the chair, pulling Phil up with him.

"We're ready to see you," The nurse told him.

Dan sighed in relief. He grabbed Phil's hand and they walked over to the nurse. They followed her until they reached a room, where they walked into. Dan bit his lip nervously as he looked around.

"You're going to be fine," Phil whispered to Dan.

Dan looked over at him and slowly nodded. "I just hate hospitals," he whispered.

"Take a seat on the bed please. Your doctor will be here in a couple of minutes," The nurse said.

"Thank you," Phil said as he looked over at the nurse.

Dan and Phil waited about 10 minutes before their doctor finally walked into the room.

"Sorry it took so long. I was with another patient," The doctor said.

"It's fine. We're not in any hurry," Phil told him.

"That's good to hear. My name is Dr. Blake. Which one of you is Mr. Howell?" Dr. Blake asked.

"That's me," Dan said as he held up his hand. "But… please call me Dan." He said.

"Alright then. Why don't you start off with telling me what's been going on?" Dr. Blake asked calmly.

"There's not much to tell really. I guess I've just been getting sick and we don't know why," Dan said.

"Dan's gotten sick before but never like this. It's been a couple weeks and it only gets worse," Phil said.

"What do you mean by getting sick?" Dr. Blake asked.

"I get sick in the morning and I have stomach aches and sometimes headaches. That's been about it. I've also been snapping at Phil a lot which really isn't like me. My mood swings have been crazy," Dan said.

"This sounds kind of crazy… but what you're describing to me is something that a pregnant female would describe to me," Dr. Blake said as he looked up at Dan.

Dan's eyes went wide with shock. "But, I'm not pregnant. I'm not a female. I'm a male!" He yelled.

"Alright. Calm down. I'm sure we'll be able to figure something out for you. We'll run a few tests and we'll have the results and then we'll be able to help you get better," Dr. Blake said.

"Okay," Dan whispered. He took a deep breath and nodded.

Phil reached over and grabbed Dan's hand and held onto it.

Dan looked over at him and Phil could tell that he was scared and nervous.

It's been another half an hour. Dan and Phil have been waiting and Dan was growing impatient.

"What the hell is taking so long?" Dan asked.

"Dan, relax… they'll be back in a bit. The doctor said this might take a while," Phil said.

Dan groaned and then he lay down on his back, sighing as he stared at the ceiling.

"Okay…" Dan looked over and immediately sat up as soon as he saw Dr. Blake walk in.

"Do you have the results? Why am I getting sick so much?" Dan asked.

"We do have the results. Remember how I mentioned pregnancy earlier?" Dr. Blake asked.

"This can't be good," Phil said. He nervously looked over at Dan.

"Don't tell me what I think you're going to tell me," Dan begged.

"Dan, you are pregnant. You've just hit your one month mark," Dr. Blake said.

"How am I p-pregnant though? I'm a male. This can't be possible," Dan said.

"It actually is possible. Have you ever read of Carriers?" Dr. Blake asked.

Dan shook his head. "No. I've never heard of them," he said.

"Well… they are male Carriers which means there are pregnant males. There are very few but there are some out there. I'll be able to explain everything to you if you like…"

Dan sat there and listened to Dr. Blake as he explained how Dan was pregnant. Dan was in shock. There were so many mixed emotions running through his body. He never ever would have thought that he would be pregnant. He just couldn't process it.

"Dan, do you know what this means?" Phil asked as he looked up at Dan with a smile.

"What?" Dan asked as he looked back at Phil.

"Dan, there's a baby growing inside you. We're going to have our own baby. We don't have to deal with anymore adoption rejections," Phil told him. "No more heartbreaks…"

"We… we're actually going to have a baby? And raise a family?" Dan asked with shock. He looked over at the doctor and then he looked back at Phil. "I don't know what to think…" He stood up from the bed. He walked over to Phil and hugged him tightly, closing his eyes as he did so.

"We're going to be parents," Phil whispered as he wrapped his arms around Dan and held onto him.

"Our own baby," Dan whispered. He hid his face in Phil's chest.

Eight months quickly passed. Dan would be giving birth any day now. These eight months have been some of the most hardest for Dan but he knew in the end that everything he went through would be worth it, because he would have a little baby in his arms at the end of it. He couldn't wait to be a dad and raise a family with Phil. It's all he ever wanted since he's been in a relationship with Phil.

"We're out of milk," Phil whined as he stood in front of the fridge, while Dan sat in the lounge.

It was a Saturday evening. Phil had just finished filming for his new Youtube video. Dan had stopped doing his Youtube videos a few months ago, when his bump came in. He refused to be on camera because of all the weight he gained. He felt fat and he didn't like it.

Dan and Phil were planning on telling all of their subscribers that Dan was pregnant after he had the baby. They already had enough stress to deal with so they didn't want to add more stress and drama.

"Milk is something we'll need for the baby!" Dan called.

Phil sighed and shut the fridge door. He walked out of the kitchen and went to the lounge.

"I guess I could go to the store real fast," Phil said.

"What if I go into labor while you're out? The doctor said it could come any day now and we're not going to the hospital until tomorrow," Dan said. He sighed.

Phil bit his lip nervously as he stared at Dan. "You're right. Milk isn't as important as getting you to the hospital for the baby. It's getting late, Dan. You need all the sleep you can get. The doctor said the birth will take a long while so you'll need to get some sleep while you can," he said.

"Phil, I'm not tired. Can't I stay up a little while more?" Dan asked, pouting.

Phil chuckled. "No, Dan. We need to listen to what the doctor told us," he said. He walked over to Dan and he carefully helped him stand up from the couch, gently holding onto him.

"Ow," Dan whined as he held onto his stomach.

"Are you okay?" Phil asked as looked over at Dan.

"I'll be fine," Dan said quickly. He held onto Phil as Phil led the way to their bedroom. Dan wobbled over to the bed and sat down. "I cannot wait to get this baby out of me."

"Just a few more days love," Phil said. He also walked over to the bed and crawled next to Dan.

"What do you think we're going to have? I want a boy," Dan said.

"Yeah, I think a boy would be cute. Are you sure we should have waited?" Phil asked.

"I want it to be a surprise. I know you're just worried about the nursery," Dan said.

"It just looks so boring right now. I can't wait to paint it and get it decorated," Phil said.

"Everything will be fine. Can we go to bed now?" Dan asked.

"I thought you weren't tired?" Phil asked, raising his eyebrows.

"Shut up," Dan snapped. He rolled his eyes and then he grabbed the blankets and covered himself.

Phil chuckled. He reached over and turned off the light.

It was around 5 o'clock in the morning when Dan had woken up. Dan gently pushed himself up. He looked over at the clock and groaned when he saw what time it was. "Ah," he put a hand on his stomach when he felt a small pain shoot through his body. "Phil." Dan said. He looked over at Phil and sighed when he saw that Phil was still sleeping peacefully. "Phil!" Dan yelled louder.

Phil immediately shot up. "What's the matter?" He asked tiredly.

"I-I think the baby is coming," Dan said as he held onto his stomach.

"What?!" Phil asked as his eyes went wide with shock.

"We need to go! Now!" Dan yelled. He took a deep breath.

"Stay there! I'll call the doctor and get the bag!" Phil said. He immediately stood up from the bed.

Dan watched as Phil got quickly dressed and then dashed out of the room. Dan reached over and grabbed his phone, gasping as he did so. He quickly sent a text to his mom to let him know that he was going in labor. Dan had only told his family and close friends that he was pregnant.

"Okay, everything is out in the car and ready to go. Are you okay?" Phil asked as he walked into their bedroom. He looked up at Dan and took a deep breath as he looked up at him.

"I'm fine. I just want to go," Dan said. He looked up at Phil. "Did you also get my bag?"

"I got both bags," Phil told him. He walked over to Dan and helped him stand up. "Are you ready for this?" He asked as he stared at Dan, smiling.

"Ready as I'll ever be," Dan said. He looked up at Phil.

"In a few hours… we'll be parents and we'll have a little baby of our own," Phil told him.

Dan smiled. "Can we go now so we can get this over with? It's going to be a long night," he said.

"Oh, right… yes. I'm just getting sidetracked," Phil said. He wrapped his arms around Dan and led him out of the house. They went straight out to the taxi and headed towards the hospital.

Dan was in labor for nearly twelve hours, and by the time everything was over… he was tired and exhausted. He had never been so exhausted before. It was definitely a long and painful process but Dan didn't care about that because now he was holding his little baby boy in his arms.

Dan had been holding the baby all by himself for about 10 minutes, he was completely in love but he wanted Phil to be with him. He looked up at the nurse. "Where's Phil?" He asked, biting his lip slightly.

The nurse looked over at Dan. "Who is he? I'll go get him for you," she said politely.

"He's my husband. He left a while ago to take a break. He should be in the waiting room," Dan told her.

"I'll be back in a few minutes," The nurse said. She turned around and walked out of the room.

Dan sighed. He looked down at the baby in his arms and smiled. "I can't believe I have a baby. A baby of my own," he whispered. He took a deep breath as his eyes began to water up.

10 minutes later; Phil was finally walking to Dan's hospital room. He had no idea that Dan had already gave birth to the baby. He was extremely excited to see the baby but also nervous.

Phil walked up to Dan's room and took a deep breath. He stood there a few seconds before he finally opened the door. He looked up and couldn't help but smile at the sight he saw. Dan was awake and was holding the baby. Phil could tell that Dan was happy even though he was tired.

"Dan?" Phil asked as he walked into the room.

Dan looked up and smiled as soon as he saw Phil. "Hey. Come meet your son," he said.

"Son? It was a boy?" Phil asked with shock. He walked over to Dan's bed.

"Just like we wanted," Dan said. He smiled proudly.

"Wow. He's beautiful. Looks just like you," Phil whispered as soon as he saw the baby.

"Yeah. He does actually. I thought of a name, by the way…" Dan said. He looked down at the baby and smiled. "How does Dillon Alexander Howell-Lester sound?" He asked. He looked up at Phil again.

"I love that name. How'd you come up with that?" He asked.

"I searched online yesterday while you were filming. I got bored and I knew we would have to come up with a name so I searched for girls and boys names. I really liked Dillon," Dan told him.

"Dillon is a great name. I really like it," Phil said.

Dan looked up at Phil. "Do you want to hold him?" He asked.

Phil's eyes went wide with shock. "Dan, I…" He began to say. He took a deep breath.

"Come on, Phil. You have to hold him at some point. Why not now?" Dan asked.

"But… what if I drop him?" Phil asked nervously.

Dan chuckled. "You're not going to drop him, trust me," he said.

Phil slowly nodded. "Okay…" He said. Phil carefully took baby Dillon away from Dan and took him in his own arms. Once Phil had a hold of him, he looked down at the baby again and couldn't help but smile proudly. "He really is beautiful. You did a good job Dan," he said quietly.

"I'm just so happy that we can finally raise our own family," Dan said.

"No more rejections. We have our own little guy," Phil said.

"Now all we have to worry about is telling the viewers…" Dan said.

"I don't even care about the viewers anymore. All I care about is my husband and our baby," Phil said.

"I can't wait to get home. I'm already tired of this stupid hospital," Dan grumbled.

"I'm sure you'll have to stay for a couple of days but it'll be worth it when we do go home," Phil said.

Dan looked up at Phil and smiled. He couldn't stop smiling.

It's been a hard past year but everything was finally coming together, just how it should be.


End file.
